A new day has come!!

Once upon a time a friend of mine told me that I don’t write except when am hurt or angry.  I argued back then eno la2 tab3an, I tend to spill my heart out whenever I feel like it…me thinks she had a point.

Zaman I used to trust writing rather than talking, then I figured la2 eno writing is a lonely act,  and although I connect in a level with a lot of people, yet I am missing the vis-à-vis human interaction…which is pretty much the essence of living (to some) not all.   I am more of a listener, but that’s not the rule, sometimes Rateeba and Ensaf –or either one- take over and I get to be the non-stop talker rather than the listener…why am I saying this right now?

I have no idea.  I just figured that it is not about Rateeba, Ensaf, or Nerro…it is about the others as well, some people make you feel comfortable from the first sight, that you can connect in an eye blink.   Others might make you feel like an alien and you are the last person they would be caught dead talking to.

It is the unspoken messages, that makes you either to talk or to resort to listening.

Quote of the day:

“People aren’t either wicked or noble. They’re like chef’s salads, with good things and bad things chopped and mixed together in a vinaigrette of confusion and conflict.”

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Walking towards sunshine

Although I am almost never alone, but I feel the loneliest ever…the most insecure and vulnerable…I’ve practically put myself in deep –lamuakhza-shit a few months ago, and couldn’t get myself out of it easily, it took me so long to get out. On the way out, I’ve lost a few things, my pride was one of them…and actually was the one thing that pushed me to fight back and try to stand up and wipe the mess out.  I am emotionally depleted, and mentally exhausted.  I did that to myself, won’t blame anyone else.  

“When I get lonely these days, I think: So BE lonely. Learn your way around loneliness. Make a map of it. Sit with it, for once in your life. Welcome to the human experience. But never again use another person’s body or emotions as a scratching post for your own unfulfilled yearnings.”  

Published in: on April 27, 2010 at 11:35 am  Comments Off on Walking towards sunshine