A new day/era in the happy valley

El title metaphoric awi 😉

إيديا في جيوبي وقلبي طــــــــرب

سارح في غربة بس مش مغترب

و حدي لكين ونسان و ماشي كده

وبابتعد ما اعرف .. أو باقـــــترب 

What a beautiful start for the day, Mounir’s voice along with Salah Jahin’s stupendous words. I had one of those (consciously) long enjoyable rides to work, I went out 5 minutes earlier than I should so I can enjoy a peaceful ride…My play list was set on Monir’s songs..and they were actually the ones that I haven’t listened to for a long time…fa I was singing along enjoying the music and celebrating a brand new day/era until un….un…….uuuuuuuuuuuun, I noticed that someone in a white Honda Civic is following me.   

At the beginning I thought eno 3adi…this is the Auto-Strad come on…people have to go this way…mafish options ya3ni…then I noticed that my stalker (usually you don’t call people stalkers unless they  really stalk you J, bas let’s call him a stalker 3ashan el bo3d el drami wel suspense) is keeping his distance keda and he is really following me, tab eih ba2a?? I tricked him and gave a right signal keda as if am gonna turn right fa he was about to turn right then he realized 3ala akher la7za that I won’t turn right.   Anywayz, I reached my work (the area I work in is quite mazy keda), fa I thought he will probably get lost or something..bardo ma7asalsh.

I had to park @ the company’s parking lot which means that I lost all my chances of having lunch outside the bldg, coz usually when we park there it is more of “forget about your car khales till 17:10”…it is practically “3elbet sardine ya m3allem” as D puts it.  I noticed my stalker parked in front of the parking lot and was getting out of the car bas I pretended that he is not there aslan and got to the bldg.

I hate my stalker for a) he screwed up the last 15 minutes in my pleasant ride, b) I will never ever forgive him for this..am stuck here for lunch L.   

And the winner is:

Needles to say that I didn’t miss the  Oscar extravaganza or any related show with all the gossip and saucy details, (oh my..I gotta cut off on this) I wonder if I ever mentioned that am a reality TV freak!! Mmmm…this is a totally different subject and needs a post on its own.  I personally found Ellen DeGeneres HILLARIOUS, Helen Mirren’s – The Queen- award is well deserved.  The 61 years old actress looked extremely vivid and more stunning than Nicole Kidman in her TOO red dress. In an interview keda Mark Antony mentioned that he came to the party as J.Lo’s Purse!!!  If I ever had a husband and discovered that he plays a purse in his leisure time..I will shoot myslef in the head. Would have loved to see the girl from “little miss sunshine” going home with an award bardo..  

In a totally separate Note:

Next Saturday isa, I will interview one of my very favourite Egyptian writers, I love reading this guy, however, I disagree with him in a few things.  I am so excited about this meeting and so looking forward to it.

 

 

An Ancient Egyptian Prayer (The Map of Love):

May you enter favored, and leave beloved.

Why??!!!

I Called it Off “again and for good”

And when he asked me about love, I said “I suck”, could have blamed him or love itself for it, but thought it is iniquitous.

 

From Eskendrella’s Concert

ده بأف مين
كلمات بديع خيري و تلحين سيد درويش

ده بأف مين اللي يألس 

على بنت مصر بأنهي وش

و النبي يجري يتليس

ماطلع كلامه طظ! فش!

النوه النووه

هي هي هيه

شغل البكش ده يا أختي

مابقاش ينفعنا دلوقتي

دي المصرية كتّر خيرها

في التربية سبقت غيرها

يا سيدي إنت

البنت تفضل محبوسة

قال جوه بيتها يكون أظبط

لحد ما تبقى عروسة

بدال ما تفضل تتنطط

العفو العفو

يا سلام

يا سلام يا إخوانا دي العبرة

ماهيش في جوة و لا برّة

عمر الحرة ما تبقى عرّة

عمر العرّة ما تبقى حرة

يا سيدي إنت

باردون يا فندي بالذمة

إيه بس عيب المصرية

الدنيا ضاقت بيك لما

ماتاخدش غير الأفرنجية

إفهم

و إعقل

يا أهبااال

يا أهبل ليه غيرنا يفارقنا

ماتخلي زيتنا في دقيقنا

دي المصرية تبيض وشك

الأفرنجية عينها في قرشك

يا سيدي إنت

اللي ماتكتبش و تقرا

الدجالين قالعين عنها

وتو ما تقع البقرة

مالحق ما تكتر سكاكينها
إخه إخيه ..إخييييه

تفوا عالجهل ميت تفة

يالا نكسر وراه شقفة

من تعليمنا أهلنا خايفة

واقعين ليه من قعر القفة

يا سيدي إنت

خليها دي حلقة في ودنك

من قبل ما تقري الفتحة

أول كلام تقوليه لابنك

وطنك مافيش زيه دحه

م النيل إمبوه

حبووووه

حبه يا نونو بالأكتر

من بابا و ماما والسكر

منه الـتسة و منه المما

إوعك تنسى فرض الأمة

يا جدع إنت

It was my first time to hear this song last night @ the concert…Samia Jahin and Aya Hmeida’s performance for the song was extraordinary kaman.

* Read Omar’s interview with Eskendrella and listen to the song here

Follow your heart or Intuition??

Follow your heart
Your intuition
It will lead you in the right direction
Let go of your mind
Your Intuition
Is easy to find
Just follow your heart baby

I like this part of Jewel’s song. 

Well, for someone like me who is quite on the romantic side of the house and not sensible enough (believe it or not I am, it only takes a couple of sweet words and I start talking wedding china), I decided long while ago to stop following my heart (there were times of relapse though), but I tend to trust my intuition…mmm..well, not really, coz I’ve been told that am too skeptic by nature, fa my intuition won’t do me any good.

But don’t you think that there is a big difference between following your heart and following your intuition…ya3ni you might love something/someone, and your heart kinda gets stuck there, but you feel like mmmmmm…”there is something fishy, a2ta3 dera3i law makansh maba7es”, “there is something wrong about this…mesh mesteraya7/a”..however, you still can’t detach yourself from that thing/one.  It happens, no?!!

Mesh 3arfa…but personally speaking, my heart has failed me several times, however, my intuition never did. Wa da 3ashan am a very insightful person who is always intouch with her inner self ;p, mashi!! Bottom line: I don’t need meditation courses 😀

From: If you forget me by Pablo Neruda

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.
If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

I am speechless after Neruda’s verses…el ragel da beysabetni 🙂

 

Emotional State:

I know the protected post aroused your curiousity awi, but it is nothing of any importance to anyone except myself, it is my break up chronicles, It is a one post kind of thing and I update it keda whenever I feel like and have something to add, I tend to document such moments, just to make sure where I stand and kaman to release the negative energy obtained from the situation. 

Anywayz, we are done, and it was ugly…I didn’t want this, and just wanted to keep the good memories…However, he considered me a “MISTAKE”..fa I was forced to press delete.

 

Work Related:

My new boss is really awesome, a heck of a sharp guy, someone you enjoy working with..he tackles your brain cells keda…fa am glad eno finally am enjoying coming to work every morning.

 

Reminder:

Tomorow Eskendrella’s Concert @ the Cutlure Wheel, 8:00 pm.

I was taught to dream

Before you met me I was a fairy princess
I caught frogs and called them prince
And made myself a queen
Before you knew me I’d traveled ’round the world
And I slept in castles
And fell in love
Because I was taught to dream

I found mayonnaise bottles and poked holes on top
To capture Tinker Bell
And they were just fireflies to the untrained eye
But I could always tell Cause I believe in fairy tales
And dreamer’s dreams
Like bed sheet sails
And I believe in Peter Pan
And miracles, anything I can to get by
And fireflies

Although am not a country music kind of person, yet this song by Faith Hill is one of very favorites.

I was taught to dream: Therefore, am the queen of my imaginary planet, I am a heck of daydreamer, I live my life the way I want no matter how irrational/inconsistent it may look to anyone else, I believe in fairy tales and I always make sure people understands they are way different from love stories, I believe in Incarnation, I make things up for myself when needed, I choose my battles and quit when I feel they are not worth fighting…I chase my dreams and will keep chasing them.

To everyone who sent a note, sms, tried to call: thank you guys and girls, am ok and as Pippi Longstocking once said “Don’t you worry about me, I will always come out at the top”…come on ya3ni…there will always be “NEXT” ;).

Bookmarks: I used Moia’s present to me (if you can’t see the photo then look @ the blog’s header) in making my own personalized bookmarks, now I have my super cute pink bookmarks…

Books: finished reading Taxi, 7ekayat Amina, gedar akhir, and Legends of the house of the cretan woman…currently reading the Map of Love..I recommend them all except the one about beit el kretleya)

Music: am I the only one who can’t relate khales to Norah Jones new album??

Love,

N “Chasing the sun with ribbons undone” 

The Aftermath

“When the strong were too weak to hurt the weak, the weak had to be strong enough to leave”…. 

Forget about the what’s and why’s at the moment, it is just we are no longer together.  It feels strange, I wish I can grant myself the right to lock my self in a room and cry my heart out, nevertheless I can’t, knowing that I will be gotten-over thru a re-bound.  There are certain things better left unsaid…

 

I know it is not the end of the world, I know there is will always be tomorrow and I believe in it BIG TIME, but I also know it is not a piece of cake, and it won’t be easy.. I need to admit and acknowledge it, get it out of my system to be able to move on and resume my life.  Right at this moment I don’t have enough strength or energy to do that and I am too numb to take an action.

 

Was watching Happy Feet last night and contemplating the thought of celebrating being one’s self. Mumble the penguin was born in a place where every penguin was born with his/her heart song, he being the result of a “bad egg” was different, he can only tap dance.  Mumble was in love with Gloria “the hottest chick” at the penguins’ empire, but of course he is not that good for her as he couldn’t sing. Gloria was in love with Mumble as well, but she didn’t have enough guts to disclose or maybe she wasn’t ready…and the movie goes on until at the end, Gloria and Mumble found out that they complete each other, and him not being able to sing but excelled in dancing saved his kind and delivered a message that wouldn’t have reached anybody.

Mmm..I sorta drift away from my main point, what I want to say is people are different, but being different is never a flaw, it only requires a better understanding and lots of patience and readiness for acceptance.

 

After the movie we decided to go for coffee, fa we started ordering and there was this friend who always associated me to Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally, and Monica in Friends, don’t know why ;)..well, I know but I am not gonna admit it.

When it was my turn to order (at this point I noticed eno my friends were just staring at me and waiting to see how different my order will end up) I ordered a Mega Latte’ without the whipped cream and no chocolate chunks, but extra caramel.. we all laughed, and my friend was like “you can’t really take things as is!!” “You gotta do things your way”..fa I replied eno isn’t it is all about choices, even the smallest ones count. 

حاول عدم التركيز مع هذه التدوينة فليس لها هدف محدد و لا يفترض استعمال العقل و المنطق اثناء قرأتها.  هي مجرد تفريغ طاقة سالبة قد “تكهرب” كل من يحاول الأقتراب او التفكير.عدت الي المنزل محملة بأطنان من الشيكولاتة قلوب و مربعات و حركات، و لكن لا أثر للورد في هذه الحمولة، علي عكس ما توقعت، فكنت مؤهلة نفسيا لرؤية باقة ورد حمراء كبيرة تستقبلني عند فتح باب مكتبي “هما بيعملوا كده في الأفلام”.. و لكنها لم تظهر، لم افقد الأمل فأنتظرتها لأخر اليوم…فلم تصل.  في مثل هذه الأحوال ينصح الأصدقاء المقربون بالامتناع عن مشاهدة الأفلام الأجنبية مع التأكيد علي ضرورة الوقوف علي ارض الواقع “شوية بقي”  عادة ما يقولونها بنفاد صبر…”عشان مفيش حاجة كدة اصلا” 

“في بنات كدة هما كلمتين حلوين و الحدوتة تبتدي، يعيشوا في تبات و نبات و يخلفوا صبيان و بنات” تسألني  تنكربل و في يدها مقصلة بمبي صغيرة، “ايه رأيك جيولتين ولا فرفر!! متبصيليش كده خلينا نخلص عالبتاع اللي في ايدك ده” ..(البتاع ده شئ هلامي شديد الشبه بفلبر بس علي أحمر)لأ هي كانت بنت واحدة اللي في دماغي..وبعدين انتي عايزة ايه مني!! ترد غاضبة “انا غلطانة انا كنت طالعة اصطادلي حلمين تلاتة و ابيعهم لقيتك قاعدة بتفكري فقلت اساعدك”….انظر اليها و لا اعرف كيف ستساعدني و قد فقدت الهالة التي عادة ما تحيط بالجنيات….اسألها عن سبب بيعها لأحلام الغير “حتي ده مستخسراه فيهم!!” فتقول لي بحزن لم اتوقعه من جنية “بسترزق، راحت علينا بقي”.  اضحك و اتسائل ان كان لديها حلم جميل لأستبدل به كابوس الليلة.  

تكرر “ها..جيلوتين ولا فرفر..خليني اريحك يا بنتي، مش هتقدري لوحدك”….لأ هقدر..و بعدين ساعدي نفسك الأول..تلملم جناحيها بكبرياء و تلعن الزمن اللي رماها عالشغلانة دي.  لا اعرف ان كان تأكيدي لها اني اؤمن بالجنيات، و الأحلام، و الغد، قد اراحها بعض الشئ ام لا.  فتنتهزالفرصة و تحلفني ببيتر بان، و كل ابطال الحواديت ان اقوم بأعادة  فلبر الأحمر مكانه. احكي لها ما حدث فترد ضاحكة “و ايه يعني!! سحابة و هتعدي”.    

“مش قلت لك كابوس… انا من اول ما لمحت ليدي ماكبث داخلة علينا و في ايدها وردة حمرا و انا مش مطّمنة” هكذا تمتمت موجهة كلامي الي تينكر قبل ان تصل الينا الليدي الدموية. ليدي ماكبث هي ضيفة شرف كل كوابيسي منذ الطفولة…بظهورها اميز الحلم من الكابوس. تمد يدها الي بالوردة فأشكرها غير مصدقة…”تزغدني” تينكر لأمد يدي و اخذ وردة ليدي ماكبث، اتردد..عادة لا تزورني الليدي الا في الكوابيس بس النهاردة تجيلي بوردة!!! مش طبيعي…تؤكد لي بطلة كوابيسي انه حقا كابوس …لا داعي للقلق، فكل شئ سيكون علي ما يرام “حتي شوفي”..تنفض الوردة التي لم اقوي حتي علي لمسها  و ينطلق منها خفافيش كثيرة تلتف حول تينكربل فتلتهمها التهاما

 

Happy Valentine’s Day

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightfowardingly, without complexeties or pride. So I love you because I know no other way than this” Pablo Neruda

The Aquarium Grotto Garden

Commonly known as geninet el asmak.
Well, I won’t start talking about how disappointed I am, or how bad I feel coz it is really sad. It is a beautiful, spacious, supposedly full of greenery kind of place..however, it is now deserted and extremely maltreated 😦
* More photos here.

From: “Born on a Blue Day,” by Daniel Tammet

Blue Nines and Red Words

“I was born on January 31, 1979 — a Wednesday. I know it was a Wednesday, because the date is blue in my mind and Wednesdays are always blue, like the number 9 or the sound of loud voices arguing. I like my birth date, because of the way I’m able to visualize most of the numbers in it as smooth and round shapes, similar to pebbles on a beach. That’s because they are prime numbers: 31, 19, 197, 97, 79 and 1979 are all divisible only by themselves and 1. I can recognize every prime up to 9,973 by their “pebble-like” quality. It’s just the way my brain works.

I have a rare condition known as savant syndrome, little known before its portrayal by actor Dustin Hoffman in the Oscar-winning 1988 film Rain Man. Like Hoffman’s character, Raymond Babbitt, I have an almost obsessive need for order and routine which affects virtually every aspect of my life.

For example, I eat exactly 45 grams of porridge for breakfast each morning; I weigh the bowl with an electronic scale to make sure. Then I count the number of items of clothing I’m wearing before I leave my house. I get anxious if I can’t drink my cups of tea at the same time each day. Whenever I become too stressed and I can’t breathe properly, I close my eyes and count. Thinking of numbers helps me to become calm again.

Numbers are my friends, and they are always around me. Each one is unique and has its own personality. The number 11 is friendly and 5 is loud, whereas 4 is both shy and quiet — it’s my favorite number, perhaps because it reminds me of myself. Some are big — 23, 667, 1,179 — while others are small: 6, 13, 581. Some are beautiful, like 333, and some are ugly, like 289. To me, every number is special.

No matter where I go or what I’m doing, numbers are never far from my thoughts. In an interview with talk show host David Letterman in New York, I told David he looked like the number 117 — tall and lanky. Later outside, in the appropriately numerically named Times Square, I gazed up at the towering skyscrapers and felt surrounded by 9s — the number I most associate with feelings of immensity”.

“My synesthesia also affects how I perceive words and language. The word ladder, for example, is blue and shiny, while hoop is a soft, white word. The same thing happens when I read words in other languages: jardin, the French word for “garden,” is a blurred yellow, while hnugginn — Icelandic for “sad” — is white with lots of blue specks. Synesthesia researchers have reported that colored words tend to obtain their colors from the initial letter of the word, and this is generally true for me: yogurt is a yellow word, video is purple (perhaps linked with violet) and gate is green. I can even make the color of a word change by mentally adding initial letters to turn the word into another: at is a red word, but add the letter H to get hat and it becomes a white word. If I then add a letter T to make that, the word’s color is now orange. Not all words fit the initial-letter pattern: words beginning with the letter A, for example, are always red and those beginning with W are always dark blue”.